when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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