Sponge bath it is.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Randomize
