Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize