She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
