My nipple is on Facebook.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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