Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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