Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
