I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
