i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Randomize
