i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
