My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
