its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
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