did you get engaged???
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize