have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
