Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
