Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
