I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
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