new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
