so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Never joke about your clitoris.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
