I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
