let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
