At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Randomize
