We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
