so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Randomize
