:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
