Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Randomize
