I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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