Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
