How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize