38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
