Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
