Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
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