it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
