what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
