when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Someone signed my nipple.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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