I cockslap morals
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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