those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
