I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize