I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
