woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
My ass is underappreciated
I am available for nakedness
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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