ya dads aren't the best wingmen
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I pour the whiskey from now on
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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