Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
