I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
