So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
