That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Randomize
