No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
