no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
It's shark week go big or go home
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
