I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I just forgot I was standing up.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
