come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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