He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Randomize
