Where did you get a picture of my penis
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
