Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize